Monday, February 27, 2006

This Vicious Cabaret

Tony Blair's controversial plan for a new law to stop people "glorifying" terrorism has been backed by MPs.

But what does that actually mean? Does this mean that by the back door the Government and the police can now prosecute anyone or any organisation they deem to be promoting what the incumbent power views as terrorism? Basically anything which suggests they should be removed, by force is necessary?

Let me explain with a current example -

The adaptation of the comic written by Alan Moore called V for Vendetta (which first appeared in Warrior Magazine - alongside his equally impressive Marvelman story) is soon to be released in the US and UK as a film.

The story is set (or was in the comic) in a Fascist Britain circa 1997 (I assume this has been now changed). There are no black people, no gay people, no descent. Only the corrupt iron fisted Governement, it's scheming jackals and the scared underclass they rule.

And then Codename V appears. A Guy Fawkes mask wearing mystery man who from the very outset sees the use of extreme violence and major acts of public destruction as the means to unsettle Britain's ruling elite.

When I and many others first read V back in 1980-1981 he was just a Shakespeare spouting freedom fighter, who would do whatever was necessary to force political change. But in light of the last few years, he is something far far more interesting than we could have imagined, he is an out and out terrorist who blows up the House of parliament, assassinates key figures of Government, and in pone artiularly chilling parallel for our times, enters a TV News room and threatens to detonate the explosive vest he wears under his cape.

Now what V is doing is attacking a Government he sees as fundamental wrong - they are racist, homophobic mass murderers. Although it is never implied that they have illegally invaded any Middle Eastern sovereign nations, but they are still bad none the less. The thing is though, you totally see the World through V, through this terrorist, and you completely understand his actions in the face of such opposition.

Now a movie is around the corner, which by all accounts is reasonably faithful to the comic. And from a certain point of view both the movie and the comic glorify V and his direct action approach to Political upheaval - It glorifies this particular form of terrorism.

So where does that leave our new law? Can this film and comic it came from become illegal.

I dunno, I would like to think that if such a ridiculous knee jerk piece of legislation came into effect the Government and police would at least have the common sense to use it wisely - then you see men like Mr Wolfgang, an octogenarian peace campaigner being roughly ejected from the Labour Party Conference in Brighton last year under new anti-terrorism legislation for simply shouting 'Nonsence' when Jack Straw was pontificating about the Governments 'reasons' for invading Iraq.

Anyway, just a thought.

This is the voice of fate, signing off.

Friday, February 17, 2006

She’s such brave girl.

Well there you go. You hurtle down a hard as nails ice trench at up to 90mph on a three grand tray, head first mark you, with your face barely an inch from major on the spot reconstructive surgery and what does the media in all it’s glory do? Patronise you.

“Oh, isn’t she such a brave girl?”

Not really surprised, just a bit disappointed that after all these years even the BBC can’t be arsed to straighten itself up and stop being so pathetically sexist.

You never hear 26-year-old men being referred to as brave boy do you? Not unless it’s fucking Dad’s Army of course.

It’s not about political correctness, it’s just about treating one another with respect.

Anyway, rather than wait for feedback from you lot on this topic I lobbied my workmates about this disgraceful treatment of a professional athletes success at a World platform event.

And the consensus from this group of intelligent women all between the ages of 25-30?

“So what?”

As my fictional hero of the early nineties slacker generation – Buddy Bradley would say;

“What’s the use?”

Go on, I don’t care anymore, call as many women as you like stupid shit like ‘bird’ or ‘chick’ or ‘Doris’ or ‘Darlin’ or whatever…

‘cause you know you fuckin’ luv it you filthy slappers!

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Another 12 hours!

at work.

That's 4 days this week already, and I'm working the weekend.

Marketing slave that I am.

Boo hoo.

And I'm poor.

How did I end up like this?

I know there are people worse off than me.

With lower paid more menial jobs,

but knowing that doesn't make me feel any less tired,

or exploited.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006


Valentine 1

Valentine 2

Sunday, February 12, 2006

DELL - Ever vigilant

Thank God for DELL(a)!

In these uncertain times (not sure what's uncertain about them, for example, I'm reasonably certain the time is 9ish Sunday evening)...

Anyway, in these uncertain times when we are surround by thieves, murderers, rapists, drug dealers, prostitutes, pimps, conmen, James Blunt, bent coppers, bent lawyers, bent benders, straight benders pretending to be bent, homophobic benders (Factory workers and Rugby Players) who hate gay benders, benders who hate other bending robots like Flexo (shifty little soul-patch aside), the white liberal middle class with their Guardians and freshly baked Saturday Batons, dodgy politicians, Ming the Merciless, Davros, dodgy politicians who are gay but pretend to be straight, straights who hate everyone including the shifty eyed Islamic nut jobs with Semtex vests and baby eating teeth forcing their way out of their crooked psychotic, despotic, fundamentalist gobs which we see portrayed so even handed in our media, cartoonists, blacks, jews, women and that...

Where was I?, Doesn't matter, anyway, in these terrible times it good to know people like Jack Bauer are out there, even in a fictional way. Jack is the kind of people who are ready at a moments notice to abuse, torture, humiliate, degrade, debase and pretend to dry hump all in the name of the greater good of the abstract concept of liberty, freedom and the right to complain about there never being anything on TV.

So it comes as no surprise that Jack and his chums use DELL on a daily basis to organise huge databases of potential terrorist profiles, format counter terrorist protocols, run intricate diagnostics on Rogue State acquired Nukes and covertly check their emails which frequently include; 20 things you’ll remember if you were born in the eighties, orders from your CIA handler, orders from your terrorist task master, and Are you a slut? – which someone has helpfully noted, ‘This really works - I’m 47% a slut, what about you?’.

Oh course DELL themselves are no stranger to taking the initiative in the War on Terrorism as this excerpt from a recent order I put together for my mother demonstrates.

Dell - Are you a terrorist

Luckily, I noticed this trick question in time and answered in the negative - God only knows what would have happened if I'd admitted that the PC was to be used for the creation of Weapons of Mass Destruction, such as weaponised nerve gas, SBDs, SBVs and straight out, unashamed blow off.

I have heard that Odai Hussain, who was a well-known 'bad boy' and 'practical joker' answered yes to this cunningly guised terrorist trap and look what happened to him, and his old man! (He’s dead, the old mans currently being fairly tried and then will be fairly executed).

Interestingly enough my Mum is called Della, which on occasion is shortened to Dell - exactly the same as the name of the company I ordered the PC from - coincidence?

Almost certainly.

Think on...

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Where's Gort Nano?

Where is Gort Nano

Friday, February 10, 2006

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Say again, Lana?

Say again Lana

Monday, February 06, 2006

Pardon me Marlon?

Pardon me Marlon

Sunday, February 05, 2006

What's that Audrey?

What's that Audrey