Sunday, April 16, 2006

An Easter tale

And then, about 20 minutes after they took Barabas away, a small brown bunny rabbit appeared at the foot of the cross which was erected on a small hill in Golgotha.

“Hello” said the little bunny rabbit.

“Hello” said the man who was nailed to the cross, which the bunny rabbit sat at the foot of.

“Why are you nailed to that piece of wood?” asked the bunny rabbit.

“Well it’s complicated,” said the man.

“Oh forget I asked,” said the bunny rabbit slightly hurt by the insinuation that he, a lowly bunny rabbit would not understand.

“Oh I’m sorry” said the man, “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“No it’s okay” said the bunny rabbit, “I can see you’ve got a lot on already, don’t worry about me”.

“Are you sure?” Insisted the man.

“Yes, I’m certain. Besides which, from your current predicament I can only assume you’ve been a very bad man which has lead to you having pieces of metal forced into your wrists and feet and then left to die on those bits of wood.”

“Hmm…” said the man, thinking, “Y’know, I really haven’t been bad at all”

“Really?” said the bunny rabbit in a tone, which was clear to the man that he was extremely dubious that the man was indeed free from the kind of sin that would typically result in being nailed to wood.

“No really” said the man. “All I did was say that it wouldn’t be such a bad idea if everyone was nicer to one another”.

“Oh” said the bunny rabbit, “That really doesn’t sound that bad at all”.

“Yes, I know,” said the man, “That and the fact that I am the Son of God and everyone should praise me and my Father a bit”.

“Err…” said the bunny rabbit as he turned to make a hasty retreat.

“Please wait a moment little brown bunny rabbit!” Cried out the man.

“Look,” said the little brown bunny rabbit, “I really need to be getting on with all my sniffing about and that”.

“Could you do me a tiny favour?” asked the man.

“It’s not going to take all day is it?” replied the rabbit as he sat up on his haunches with his front paws resting on his hips.

“No, not all, it’s very, very simple.” said the man.

“Okay, I’ll do it. But I want you to know” said the bunny rabbit, “that I’m doing it because as luck would have it I was a gap in my schedule for today.”

“I understand.” Said the man.

“And it has nothing to do with you being the Son of God and that,” continued the rabbit, “’cause I’m really not into all that social climbing stuff.”

“No, no, I understand. I can tell that you are a decent little creature with no aspirations to get a leg up to be a fixture of any annual religious festivals that may or may not result from this current event.”

“Okay then,” said the rabbit, “what can I do you for?”

“Well…” said the man, “I’m really rather peckish, could you get me a snack?”

“No problemo, and what about you Sir?” said the rabbit to man who was also nailed to pieces of wood next to the fellow with whom the rabbit was having this most unusual conversation.

“I wouldn’t mind something sweet” said the man with a croaky voice.

“Okay then,” said the rabbit. “I’ll be back in a tick”.

And off he shot, down the hill along the dusty road and into town.

The sun beat down and the men drifted in and out of consciousness, until about an hour and a half had passed.

“Mush” said the rabbit.

There was no response.

“Oi mush!” he repeated only this time with greater vigour.

The man slowly awoke and looked down as far as he could, “Oh, you’ve come back” he said to the rabbit.

“You betchya” said the rabbit, “And I’ve got you some ace nosh”.

“Oh good” said the man, “what is it?”

“A chocolate egg” said the rabbit.

“A what?” said the man somewhat perplexed.

“A chocolate egg” repeated the rabbit.

“And what is that?” asked the man.

“It’s chocolate, fashioned into the shape of an egg,” explained the rabbit.

“Oh right,” said the man, “Can I have a piece?”

The rabbit proceeded to throw piece after piece up to the man and to the Gentleman to his left who also requested something sweet to eat.

After a short while, the chocolate egg was all gone.

“Tell me little one,” said the man, “where did you get the chocolate egg from?”

“Well,” said the little brown bunny rabbit, “I actually got it from home.”

“Oh, and where is home for you?” asked the man.

“You know the town of Ster?” said the rabbit.

“Yes” said the man, “I do believe I do.”

“Well,” said the rabbit, “I live in a small hole in the ground, just to the East of there.”

That is how the crucifixion of the Christ, chocolate eggs and the East Ster bunny rabbit have come to be celebrated together at this time of year.


pissoff said...

Thanks for clarifying that for me Herge. I always wondered how the Easter bunny and chocolate eggs came about.

Ship Creak said...

It's as likely as anything, I guess.

garfer said...

Glad to see that one cleared up.

I'm still confused about Epiphany, it sounds like something to do with lisping, but I'm not sure, amd that.

Rowan said...

nice! I think I prefer your explaination to the one at my site....yours is somehow, more interesting.