Friday, March 18, 2005

If...TV Goes Down the Tube - Fuck me it has!!

Okay, this is where I have to ask the question – “Is anybody actually reading this stuff?”

The reason I ask is this,

If... TV Goes Down the Tube
Mon 21 Mar, 11:20 pm - 12:20 am 60mins

‘Drama-documentary about the future of digital technology and its impact on our lives. It follows the story of a mother struggling to cope with the death of her daughter on a reality television programme, through which she discovers a far bigger political plot. Starring Saskia Reeves, Elizabeth McKechnie and Antony Byrne. Contains some strong language.’


We already have the following top-flight shows brought to you with tireless coverage by the Angry Chimp team, and each and every one of them PROVES TV is already well in the toilet.

now airing on angrychimp
Just some of our fine output.

Death Row Big Brother – Extreme crime/punishment version of Big Brother, now about to start a second season.

Celebrity Jungle Hunt – Z-list celebrities fight for their lives in the Oz outback

Celebrity Euthanasia Challenge – We have already seen the deaths, LIVE, of Seb Coe and Brian Dowling – and I’m guessing Johnny Vaughan will be next, and you know what? I bet I’m right.

Castrato Academy – let’s face it, some of those castrations are bound to go sceptic with the loss of innocent young high-pitched lives.

Celebrity Outing: LIVE – bound to see some post revelation suicides - that bloke who plays Grant Mitchell anyone?

Concentration Camp Revisited – God how we laughed when they went into the shower block and we expected them to be gassed, but NO! Water came out instead – no wait – that was Schindler's List.

Fight Academy – Like Fight Club, only less so.

Celebrity Wife Rape
- You must remember the show where Vernon Kay’s missus fell to the might of Freddie Starr booze and rage filled frenzied attack? That was quality TV - soon to be followed by Celebrity Wife Abortion.

Child Swap – Chav swapped brats with Toffs, and vice a versa.

Virginity Lost: LIVE – Very popular with the pre-teens and STDs

So how the BBC can show a programme that suggests that maybe, just maybe TV is descending into a mess of ill-produced, mindless, tawdry, shite, simply beggars belief.

And if the listings above don’t grab you – just switch your telly on at anytime and you can find a hundred other shows just as vile.

Fucking BBC.


A Blogger said...

Couldn't agree more!

Just thought I'd pop in and let you know I have replied to your post. Here is a copy ....

My police handler, and yes that does make me sound like a dog, but I promise I'm not!
And no, he probably shouldn't be doing that to me!

A police handler, handles my life, under strict scrutiny from the Home Office and other various Government Institutions.

You will only need one, if (for example) you

a>Have witnessed something terrible
b>Your life is in danger for some reason or other
c>You've killed at an early age, and the public hate you - so you need re-locating and a new identity to be able to get on with your life as if nothing ever happened.

I do not recommend any, but if the idea appeals to you then you should hang around the rough areas and wait for a crime to happen. For an added bonus, try mingling with the Mafia or Triads etc. Then you'll really shoot up to be an 'A Class' citizen!

If they do not shoot you first...

Hope my ideas have helped!


My blog...

Sniffy said...

Too funny for words (and too true to be funny!), that's this blog!

You are a true public servant, Herge; I feel a New Year's honour coming your way. Don't know which year though.

Sniffy said...

Oh where, oh where has my angry chimp gone?

Herge Smith said...

Sorry, been off stirring up trouble, creating discontentment, rabble rousing... that sort of thing.

Had some housework to do as well.

Anonymous said...

...and a new bird keeping you busy...