Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Whatever happened to Dalek?

The Sun - Dalek cover
'News is always more trivial in the Sun'

With every rocket into the stratosphere is an inevitable fall back to earth and that is exactly the course that the star of both ‘Dalek and Borg’ the popular blogstrip and ‘Dr Who’ BBC’s flagship historical drama is set on.

Dalek first came to the public attention with an appearance in the second series of Channel 4’s smash hit reality game show ‘Big Brother’. Eventually winning in a dramatic finale which saw Dalek initially come second to a multi-sexual legal secretary, and then default to the winning position once Lindsey Hannity (25) from Brighton, East Sussex had been ‘EXTERMINATED’

It was not long after this that he secured the converted role of ‘super villain’ in the BBC’s re-imagining of Dr Who.

Heavily criticised in the press for the decision to cast a non-actor ex-reality TV star in such a prestigious role, the BBC justified the choice by claiming it was certainly better than sticking some has-been ex-pop tart in the part.

Dr Who went on to become a massive ratings grabber and Dalek was immediately propelled into the spotlight, a position Dalek readily accepted.

Good borg keeping
Borg - y'know, working, nothing serious, but working

However, it was never enough for Dalek, who mistakenly took the public attention for granted. A mistake he painfully came to realise when he was booed off stage at LIVE: 8 by a furious crowd who disapproved of both his suggestion of simply ‘EXTERMINATING’ the poor to solve the problem, and his refusal to similarly ‘EXTERMINATE’ popular ‘self-obsessed’ cat strangler, Dido.

During the now infamous post concert press conference, Dalek justified his decision to leave Dido alive, whilst happily ‘EXTERMINATING’ Bono, Sir Paul McCartney, Sir Elton, Coldplay and Robbie Williams,

“I am Dido’s biggest fan” he said, “All the most evil, twisted and criminally insane super-villains rate Dido. Although Coldplay does come a close second, but you have to draw a line somewhere”

dalek and smash3
The infamous 'couple' at London Premier in January

The following question was regarding the alleged affair between Dalek and faded TV advert star Smash Robot. Dalek became incensed at the suggestion that this was anything other than a close personal friendship, and began to ‘EXTERMINATE’ the amassed crowd of reports in his signature fashion.

Sacked by the bosses at BBC 1 for repeatedly appearing in the tabloid newspapers, drunk, violent and often rusty, Dalek found a new home as one half of the comedy double act, ‘Dalek and Borg’.

Successfully running for a number of months, it appeared all Dalek’s personal problems were behind him. That was until he had a expletive laden melt down live on air during a special appearance in the satirical talking point piece 'Your Mate Dave’.

your mate dalek MELTDOWN
NOT your mate Dalek, frankly.

Although Dalek’s exact whereabouts are currently unknown, there are rumours that Dalek and Borg are back together and are soon to relaunch the act in a new version of popular strip. Whether this ever sees the light of day, only time will tell.

34 comments:

Nobody Special said...

Yey!!!!

Kenny said...

That Good Housekeeping cover deserved a post of its own. Utterly top notch.

Herge Smith said...

May well do Andy... was there a article inparticular you were interested in?

Unknown said...

This is a work of genius.

That photoshop book you 'robbed from a sucker' obviously paying off.

Herge Smith said...

Anyone fancy a game of guess which film/ robot I'm referencing in the Good Housekeeping cover?

No.

Sod ya then

Rainypete said...

You on about the Blade Runner bit or Bender from Futurama?

Herge Smith said...

All of the magazine articles - (atleast all of them - I think)

Blade Runner is in there as is Futurama, but there are more.

Anonymous said...

Loved the Smash Robot love affair.

You wouldn't happen to have referenced Red Dwarf's Kryten would you?

Herge Smith said...

Convict - yep - the actual magazine is a reference to Kryten - as a domestic droid, but there are a ton more out there.

Kenny said...

Now you are showing more than a passing sign of being a nerd. ;)

Herge Smith said...

And proud of it.

Karen said...

Looking forward to more Dalek and Borg. Can't say I'm geeky enough to get any of the other robotic references in the Good Housekeeping cover.

Unknown said...

the lubricated motivator - that's Star Wars surely (shortly before the R2 unit blows up - he's got a bad motivator?)

rainypete got the bladerunner nexus 6 ref. and the 'kill all humans' Bender ref.

astromech - I'll have a think on that one, maybe when not at work.

Nobody Special said...

Spin my nipple nuts and send me to Alaska! Can't believe I missed the Kryten ref.

M said...

These look so good, that I often think are thse real or did Herge doctor them. Then of course I realise that your brilliant mind is working overtime for your and our amusement. You really are talented, sir!!

Herge Smith said...

Nice one Eddy, that's a couple more done... but astromech...COME ON! This one has been mentioned A MILLION TIMES in the last couple of weeks.

Trillion, it was a broad reference, but hats off to convict.

MHN - thanks for your kind words. I really just do stuff that makes me laugh, otherwise I wouldn't bother. I'm glad y'all like it as well.

Ms Mac said...

Hurrah!

Dalek is really Dido's biggest fan? I would never have guessed.

Unknown said...

What a dumbass, R2 is an astomech. Doh

Herge Smith said...

Nice one edwaado, in fact he's an astRomech, but I get the idea.

And the others...?

Herge Smith said...

HI MS MAC!!! nice of you to drop by. Yeah, it's no secret the Daleks love of Dido, but then he is insane with hatred soooo.....

M said...

btw: I left you a link on Scooter Commuter post about Scooter therapy about Hooter's. Enjoy. Lots of "guy" eye candy.

Unknown said...

I'm really stuck on Delos. It is referenced in Star Trek but I reckon that's too obscure. There was a character in Dr Who called Delos in an episode called Romans, but I don't think its that either. There's even a planet Delos mentioned in Stargate - but you wouldn't toy with me like that would you?

Apollo was born on the island of Delos - so was it referenced in Battlestar Galactica?

Island? You've not figured out Lost have you?

Its gonna be something really easy isn't it?

Anonymous said...

Is cubes a reference to Terrahawks? Delos comes from Westworld ... ok, so I googled that one.

Wyndham said...

Delos is, of course, the company that owns Westworld so we're talking... The Gunslinger. Acid in face-plate and suchlike.

Wyndham said...

Dammit,sorry convict, but I should have read all those comments properly. I just got all excited!

Herge Smith said...

Delos is Westworld - nice work convict.

As for cubes... erm, think you may be looking to hard, who's the cover star?

Herge Smith said...

Okay - but there is ONE more to go...

come on folks, don't let me down - this is the internet - domain of the geeks.

Anonymous said...

Nah, Terrahawks had an android and did exist ... honest ... humphs

Sniffy said...

There were about 4 or 5 posts rolled into one in that one. Each one was pure genius. Thank you Herge. You brightened my morning when I saw that.

Fantastic!

Connie said...

Borg is looking quite sexy on the Good Housekeeping Cover....
(ah yes, most likely the pic has been airbrushed to take out the blemishes...)

garfer said...

You are too profligate with your genius sir.

Faltanus said...

The nexus is some strange twist in the space-time continuum that destroys Whoopi Goldberg's planet in Star Trek Generations and sucks people into a fantasy life. Captain James T. Kirk is "rescued" (??? I don't know, the land of the nexus seemed pretty good to me) from that fantasy world by Captain Jean Luc Piccard.

Faltanus said...

did i really write that?

wow i'm a serious geek, aren't i?

Rowan said...

I just re-read this now that I'm in a better mood. This was a masterpiece, I'll be surprised if you can surpass this beaut. Dare ya to try *teasingly taunts*