Garfer over at Tunnocks Teacakes For Ever
Reprinted with no permission from The Guardian Weekend Suppliment
Kate Moss & Pete Doherty
Kate When I first set eyes on Pete I knew that he was the (next) one for me. As a premier rock chick and black widow, I couldn’t help but fall for him. I might be just a little Croydon thickie, but I see myself as a noughties Anita Pallenberg. Pete is my Keith Richards, and is perfect as a rock appendage. I’ve always been a bit bulimic, now I can carry it off as heroin chic! I love that thing that Pete does to me with his crack pipe when we’re naked in the Jacuzzi together.
Pete As a poet and rock god, I need a bit of fluff to make me look good in the tabloids. I really love Kate, and it’s got nothing to do with me being smacked out of my head constantly. Kate is very adventurous sexually: I love it when she says, “put it away Pete, you’re embarrassing me”. Kate knows I’m really something. What with me always being in the papers, having access to great Colombian gear, and getting paid suitcases full of cash, she knows she’s onto a good thing. She looked dead sexy at Glasters with her bijou wellies and micro skirt; you could almost see her fanny. I see Kate and myself as true soul mates. Craig Taylor
4 comments:
Ha ha ha ha ha ha. I've been waiting for something on this pair. Who the fuck is Pete Doherty anyway? I'd never heard of him until he had a heroin overdose just to get into the Sunday Mirror. He's an ugly fuck, ain't he?
Nice work.
I read it as "It's got nothing to do with me being smacked about the head repeatedly".
I know, wishful thinking...
Tina
yeah, and look at Kate Moss. I've seen better legs on a broiler chicken.
Steve
Doherty deserves to be smacked about the head. Druggie tosspot.
petey seems rather.....light on his feet
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